Let me tell you about a great side effect of almost dying in a car accident. Even though my broken knee joint was beautifully repaired, it will never be right and my unbroken knee is none the less truly screwed up - torn meniscus, damaged cartilage, some charming arthritis. Yeah all that sucks but it also means that I can't do the family grocery shopping*. Too much walking. And I refuse to use those electric wheel carts some grocery stores have. I'm not that fucking old or pathetic. And anyway, I would be afraid the battery would die in the store waaaaay back by the dairy case and then I would feel like an idiot.
You know what you don't get when you don't go grocery shopping? That's right. For TWO YEARS I haven't had a cold. What's the Very Best Way To Get A Cold? Go wrap your hands around the handles on your average grocery cart. I'm willing to bet a MILLION DOLLARS (yeah, I don't have a million dollars but I'm willing to bet it because I KNOW I'M RIGHT) that you've never seen a conscientious grocery store employee de-germing those grocery carts. Think about what you see in grocery stores. People coughing. People putting their kids with runny noses in the top shelf seats of those carts. People sneezing. People doing all sorts of germy things. And they do ALL of that on the grocery cart handles.
On Monday, I thought "Let's Be Brave". All I needed was bread, some canned corn, a twelve pack of diet coke, and a twelve pack of cherry coke. I knew these items were three aisles apart, all near the front of the store. So I did it. I went to the grocery store and I PUT MY HANDS on the handles of a grocery cart.
And I got what I deserved. Got any Mucinex?
*I don't have the words to tell you about the joy that my husband gets when I hand him a grocery list and then harass him:
"Buy the Del Monte even if the Green Giant stuff is on sale."
"Don't get the spinach in the bag - get a nice big unwrapped bundle."
"THIS is a Roma Tomato. Don't buy it."
"Buy the blue box of tampons, not the pink box. Nothing stinks more than a deodorant tampon."
"There IS a difference between cake flour and all purpose flour. Yes there is! Don't look at me that way." And his very favorite:
"THIS is Lysol. Take it. Spray it on the handle of the grocery cart before you touch it. What??? JUST DO IT." Labels: accident, personal urban drama |
wow, that is a brilliant observation. i try to wipe down the equipment at the gym for the same reason, even if it makes me look like "the ocd germ freak."
washing my hands 30 times a day at work helps too.
not shopping is frustrating i bet.